So, I decided to write a blog on my marriage of five years. The reason I have chosen to blog about this topic is because during that time I experienced a significant amount of marital and personal growth. As some of you may have noticed via facebook and/or twitter, my husband and I celebrated five years of marriage on July 15, 2011. My husband and I got married at the age of 25 years old. Since then a lot has transpired. We have worked through a lot of challenging times and rejoiced in the good. I can honestly say that despite the challenging moments in our marriage we have still experienced great love and growth with one another.
As a woman that was raised by a single mother, I was not afforded the opportunity to see a marriage relationship in the home setting. Now, I am not saying that in order for a marriage to work you must have grown up in a home where there was a functioning marriage, but I do feel that it helps. When I got married, we experienced a long honeymoon stage, but then reality set in and the real work began. I am not only talking about the expected role of a wife (cooking, cleaning, etc.), but the ability to show and give love both during the good and bad times. I think my biggest challenge was showing affection towards my husband in general, but even more so of a challenge when the situation was not as pleasant. At first, I could not figure out why I had such a challenge with this, but then God started to reveal to me that the women who had a hand in raising me very seldom showed any affection towards their mates. I did not realize how much that affected me until I began my marriage and was not capable of showing the affection that my husband longed for. Don't get me wrong, I was no hard knock, but it was a challenge. In addition, I had challenges submitting and receiving direction from my husband, again another trait learned inadvertantly while growing up around strong-willed women that never depended on any man to get things done for them. Please don't misunderstand what I am saying; being independent as a woman is awesome, but when God has blessed you with an amazing man of God that is willing to do for you and show you the love and respect that you deserve, you should no longer have that "independent woman" mentality as I had going into my marriage.
God used my Pastor and other spiritual women to help mold and shape me into the virtuous woman God called me to be both personally and as a wife. I also stood on several scriptural readings to help me overcome some of the things that I was taught in my childhood. One passage in particular that I continue to stand on is the one my husband and I stood on during our courtship into our marriage and that is 1 Corinthians 13:4-8, "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perserveres. Love never fails." This scripture ministered to me so much because it gave me the ability to be selfless, and when I started exercising that ability, the oneness between my husband and I increased.
Now that it has been five years since we said, "I Do," I can honestly say that I am a totally different woman. One that knows how to show her husband affection both in private and in public. I have also gotten a lot better in allowing my husband to lead and direct our family as the head of the household. The love and bond that my husband and I share is unbreakable by any man because our union was and still is ordained by God. I really thank God for my husband as he has helped me to grow and develop spiritually, mentally, and emotionally. My husband is truly the wind beneath my wings and I look forward to spending eternity with him. Below are different pictures of us over the past 5 years of our marriage :o).